We are thrilled that Orphan Black is returning for Season 4 this Thursday — so thrilled that we might just have to throw a party! And what better to serve than a menu inspired by Orphan Black’s resident foodie Helena. This is a woman who clearly loves food and isn’t afraid to show it, and whose motto just might be “Always Be Eating.” So let’s get down to the selections!
Nothing quite beats a great piece of fried chicken, and Helena sure knows how to relish eating one, even when she’s being held captive by a cult-like religious group trying to breed clones. Which reminds us, please make sure your chicken isn’t laced with sedatives to put you into a compliant state for some strange ritual. Maybe it speaks to her confidence that she’s got this whole kidnapping situation under control, but it’s more likely she’s just viciously hungry in that nearly-feral Helena way. Now aren’t you hungry for a chicken leg, too? Check out this tasty recipe on the Family Recipes Wiki.
When Helena and her new love Jesse first meet in a small-town bar, our girl — who introduces herself as “Crazy” – has just ordered herself a slew of cocktails (more on that later). Handsome Jesse is intrigued by our blonde Ukranian bombshell and strikes up a conversation with her. She offers to trade him a White Russian for his pork rinds, he agrees, and love is born. He knows the way to her heart, clearly.
Soon after, the pair is carrying out such romantic traditions as arm wrestling and beating dudes bloody on top of pool tables. Ah, romance!
Early on in the series, Helena is killing off the clones, and Sarah wants to get to the bottom of just who is picking them off one by one. Armed with a butter knife, Sarah confronts her in a diner, a seemingly safe public place. Draped in her trademark parka, Helena mutters something to Sarah about, “I’m supposed to kill you, too.” But who cares about killing when you can fully and thoroughly enjoy a dish of bright red Jell-O. Honestly, I don’t think anyone can really relish anything quite as much as Helena enjoyed that jiggly dessert, slurping it and gobbling it down. But then she adds about 10 spoons of sugar to it, which was apparently a bridge too far.
In Season 2, Sarah’s starting to accept her twin sestra a bit more, but not everyone’s so accepting of the psycho-clone. After Helena escapes the crazy Proletheans, making her way back from the farm in her bloody Mennonite wedding gown, she ends up back in the hands of Sarah, who then leaves her with Felix, who then leaves her with police officer Art. She tries to stab him with a pen, so he ends up cuffing her and asking her questions about her captors. He tries to coax answers out of her by giving her sardines (which she drowns in mustard) and then powdered donuts. After shoving one in her maw, she leans in, “I want to tell you something….” Art eagerly asks what, and she taps the donut container, and says, “These I like.” These I like, too, Helena. And if you do, too, here’s the Donuts Wiki’s recipe for Cake Donuts; just add your powdered sugar.
All of the Drinks
When it comes to the drinks part of the menu, Helena’s also got us covered, and I mean ALL of us. Or she would if she wasn’t going to drink them all herself. From the same bar scene involving the pork rinds, Helena celebrates her new-found freedom by ordering a drink at the bar. But since she knows nothing about cocktails, she just orders a handful that sound good to her. From left to right, she’s got a White Russian, a martini, a Bloody Mary, a whiskey shot, a Tequila Sunrise, a tequila shot, and a Blue Hawaiian. Soon after, Jesse sidles up beside her, trades that White Russian for the pork rinds and more shots ensue. Of course, all those drinks lead to trouble, so maybe drink a bit more responsibly than Helena.
And last but not least, there’s Helena’s very favorite breakfast food ever: toast! Perhaps give it out as a party favor, shoving a few slices in your guests’ pockets on their way out the door.
Now you’re ready! Our menu is complete. Get busy setting up the goodies for your Clone Club Party, invite over all your fellow Helena fans, and tune in for the season premiere together. Cheers!
For more on Orphan Black including info on all the show’s characters, storylines and more, check out the Orphan Black Wiki.