Reasons Cyclops from the X-Men is a Bad Date

Nick Peron

Hey there, heroes. I’m back again with another look into the world of Marvel Comics. With the upcoming Death of X out soon, I thought it was a great time to look into the love life of Cyclops, leader of the X-Men. Why? When you mention Cyclops, most people recall the version of characters who has appeared in various cartoons and films about the X-Men. Those versions of Cyclops were always in love with and faithful to his teenaged sweetheart Jean Grey. However, in the comics, Scott Summers is hardly the faithful boy scout portrayed in other media.

Here are some reasons why you probably shouldn’t date Cyclops:

He Moves on Quickly

In the world of the X-Men, relationships often take breaks when the love of your life sacrifices her life for the greater good. Jean Grey has done that twice (sorta)*. A cardinal rule of the X-Men world is that death is like a revolving door, with dead characters coming back all of the time. Suffice to say, with the mortality rate having a rewind button, a mourning lover just needs to start sending out invitations to the welcome back party and wait for the heartfelt reunion. Everyone except for Cyclops that is. The evidence your honor:

In X-Men #113, Jean Grey is believed to have died in a battle against Magneto. Eventually, the X-Men make it back to America and the first thing Cyclops does is hook up with Colleen Wing from X-Men #118124. In the following issue, Cyclops learns Jean is still alive and his brief fling with Colleen is never mentioned again.

When Jean seemingly died saving the universe in X-Men #137, Cyclops quit the X-Men and soon worked on a ship commanded by Aleytys Forrester in Uncanny X-Men #143. She at least had the good sense to dump him after he got her caught up in a battle against Magneto in Uncanny X-Men #168.

He didn’t wait long after Aleytys either because, well that brings up my next point…

* I know that some of these examples are actually the Phoenix Force posing as Jean Grey, but I’m trying to keep this simple.

You Probably Remind Him of His Ex

Not long after Cyclops lost who he thought was Jean Grey, he met Madelyne Pryor in Uncanny X-Men #168. She was a seemingly normal person who worked for Cyclops’ grandparents’ airline. Added bonus: Madelyne looked a heck of a lot like Jean Grey.

They kind of look the same.... If you squint a little....

The two begin romancing each other, and even though he has the nerve to ask if she is Jean Grey, she still decides to date a guy who clearly has some issues he needs to work out.

Pictured: The correct response.

Worse, she agrees to marry him and the couple have a kid together.

Which, you’d think would seal the deal, but I warned you that X-Men come back from the dead all the time.

He’ll Abandon Your Family

What’s worse than living under the shadow of a dead Jean Grey? Being abandoned by your husband for a living Jean Grey.

When Jean Grey is found miraculously not-dead she and the original X-Men then reformed as X-Factor a group that was like Ghostbusters for mutants.

Never evoke the name of the dead girlfriend, it backfires horribly.

Scott scores double points for being the worst person ever with this stunt. Not only does he abandon his wife and child, but he also keeps them a secret from Jean. Only after Madelyne (rightfully) disappears on him, does someone decide to tell Jean the truth.

"Oh wow, he left it to his best friends to tell her! What a surprise!" - Said nobody.
"Oh wow, he left it to his best friends to tell her! What a surprise!" - Said nobody.

Jean is not entirely happy about the whole situation, especially when Scott begins accusing her of being Madelyne and/or the Phoenix. Seriously this guy has some massive issues.

He’s Easily Seduced by Telepaths

Most of you X-Fans out there probably already know about the time that Cyclops was being seduced by Emma Frost.

Also, you probably know that they also hooked up shortly after Jean Grey died (again). They even make out on her grave, it’s all pretty tasteless, but it’s not the first time something like this has happened.

He was also seduced a while back by Psylocke, who was ballsy enough to pull this stunt while Jean Grey was still among the living. Starting in Uncanny X-Men #294 , Psylocke attempted to telepathically charm her way into Cyclops’ pants.

This led to a cat-fight between Jean and Psylocke in X-Men #20. Who knows where this would have gone if Jean hadn’t interfered?

I can think of at least two other women who would want to shoot you right now.

Since I’m on the subject of Jean Grey attacking another woman….

The Women In His Life Eventually Try to Kill Everyone

All of the examples above all lead to one conclusion: The women in Cyclops’ life go crazy and try to kill everyone.

When the Phoenix Force posed as Jean Grey, it eventually was driven mad and wiped out the population of an entire planet. Eventually, the Phoenix became lucid enough to commit suicide to save the universe, but it could have ended differently.

Remember when Cyclops abandoned his wife and child? Well, Madelyne Pryor eventually sold her soul to a demon named N’Astirh turning New York into a hellish inferno. The X-Men and X-Factor had to stop her from sacrificing a number of mutant babies (including her own child!) to prevent the spell from becoming permanent. In the end, Jean Grey was forced to kill Madelyne to save the world.

Emma Frost has possessed the Phoenix Force on two occasions and used that power to either destroy her friends or subjugate the world.

What I’m trying to say here is this: If you date Cyclops, he’ll ruin your sanity and you’ll try to blow up the Earth.

He’s Been Tainted By the Ultimate Evil

One of the X-Men’s long-standing foes is the nearly immortal mutant known as Apocalypse. During the Twelve event, he gathered twelve mutants fated to grant him ultimate power. That story ends with Cyclops getting merged with Apocalypse, who then took over his body. While Cyclops is eventually found and freed from Apocalypse, he was tainted ever since.

Finally, Cyclops finds someone with something in common.

Cyclops wasn’t exactly a boy scout before (just look at his first marriage), but he became an even worse person after the fact. His infidelities aside, he was also partially responsible for dividing the X-Men, starting a war with the Avengers, becoming a mutant terrorist, and every time he’s possessed by the Phoenix Force himself, he’s also tried to enslave everyone or wipe out humanity.

That sounds kind of genocide-y.

So there you have it, if you’re looking for Mr. Right, then you’re going to want to stay away from Cyclops of the X-Men. Dating him should rank below “giving up and buying a ton of cats”. At least cats can’t usurp the power of the Phoenix (yet).

Nick Peron
Stand-Up Comedian from Ottawa, Canada. Long time contributor at the Marvel Database Wiki. Banned in China.
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