‘Family Guy’: 5 Reasons Lois Should Divorce Peter

April/Lyric
TV Animation
TV Animation

Seth Macfarlane’s series Family Guy has been the king of animation targetting adults since its premiere in 1999. The show may be known for its outlandish, topical humor and infamous cutaway gags, but, at its core, it’s a show about family. The heads of the family, Peter and Lois Griffin, obviously love each other. However, their relationship isn’t all rainbows and sunshine — and it’s all Peter’s fault. His antics not only cause Lois anxiety but also tend to place in her physical danger. It’s a wonder that Lois has survived this long. So, here are five reasons why Lois should divorce Peter Griffin.

What Are Feelings?

Lois and Peter at a nightclub

Peter Griffin isn’t exactly the poster child for maturity. He’s quick to anger, doesn’t think before he speaks, and lacks the patience and empathy necessary to properly deal with his wife’s feelings and insecurities. Each of his personal relationships has been negatively affected by his unsavory behavior but none more so than his marriage to Lois.

In the episode “Lois Comes Out of Her Shell,” Peter makes a speech for Lois’s birthday. It starts out strong, with Peter saying how much he loves his wife and appreciates her being there for him. But he quickly goes off the rails, likening her body to that of aging, broken-down equipment.

The insensitive speech sends Lois into an emotional tailspin that leads to a self-destructive mid-life crisis — in which she attends a Justin Bieber concert with the intention of seducing him. If Peter had just taken her feelings into account, this dark period could have been avoided. But, instead, Lois was made to feel inadequate — as a wife and a woman — thanks to Peter’s inflammatory comments.

Unnecessary Chaos

The Family at their new farm

One of Peter’s defining traits is his penchant for the ridiculous. Each week, his onscreen antics seem to get worse, but he never learns his lesson. Obviously, this causes Lois a buttload of stress. She even begins to wonder if her parent’s disapproval of Peter is warranted — and, trust us, it totally is.

Just take a look at the episode “Farmer Guy.” An increase in neighborhood crime leads Peter to move his entire family to a farm. Uprooting your family on a moment’s notice is hard. It’s even worse when you have no idea how to run a farm, so now your family is running a meth lab just to survive.

Sure, by the end of the episode, they return to Quahog — but not before a chemical fire causes the farmhouse to explode. Peter’s heart may have been in the right place, but his lack of planning and foresight show that he’s incapable of making clear-headed decisions. Lois would do well to take note of this when she files her walking papers.

He’s Physically Harmed Her

Lois wrapped in gauze after getting burned

Sure, Lois and Peter love each other, but that’s not enough to justify the physical harm Peter has caused her over the years. In the episode “Petarded,” this history of abuse reaches a whole new level of horrible and nearly kills Lois in the process.

When Peter discovers that he ranks below the average level of intelligence for a person, he uses it to his advantage. He goes around town committing inappropriate acts, such as kicking open the stall doors in the women’s restroom. To avoid responsibility, he blames his behavior on his intellectual disability, which makes it impossible for anyone to hold him accountable.

This streak of unchecked behavior eventually leads him to a fast food restaurant. Peter plays around with the equipment — and the hot grease in the kitchen. Unsurprisingly, he ends up catapulting hot grease at Lois’s face, and the extreme burns she receives lands her in the hospital. If Lois wants to live to see her grandkids, then she should leave now.

Horrible Parenting

Meg and Peter from Family Guy drinking together

We expect parents to protect and love their children, but Peter Griffin clearly missed the memo. In fact, he basically fails at parenting most of the time. While he may not be a monster, he’s certainly neglectful — something that Lois, as a parent, should be concerned about.

One of Peter’s (as well as the entire family’s) cardinal sins is his poor treatment of Meg. He puts her down, criticizes her looks, and even get physically violent with her. In the episode “Untitled Griffin Family History,” Meg runs out of her room during a break in to figure out what’s happening downstairs. Peter listens to her panicked questions and, instead of consoling his daughter, smacks her in the face with a baseball bat. Negative experiences like this one tend to have a lasting negative impact on children. All the more reason for Lois to take the kids and run before further harm is done.

He Drains the Family Savings

The Petercopter

Peter is the kind of person who acts on a whim and asks for the price tag later. It’s often played for laughs, and the show has even joked that FOX pays for his adventures. But in the grand scheme of things, it’s not right to spend money that could be going back into the household on random overpriced items like the Peter-copter, which first appeared in “The Cleveland-Loretta Quagmire.”

Peter bought the wacky copter with what has to be an inordinate amount of money. (After all, it’s a custom helicopter.) He then carelessly crashes it into Joe’s lawn. You’d think Peter is rolling in dough. But we know that’s not the case, as Lois later reveals that Peter bought the helicopter even though they couldn’t afford it. We can only assume that the purchase sent the family into debt. When most of your household income goes toward your husband’s wacky hijinks, it might be time to call it quits.

April/Lyric
All forms of geekdom are my passion. I can geek out with the best of em'