Sometimes, society picks up a phrase or a particular piece of knowledge that becomes so ingrained in the human psyche that we can’t accept that it’s wrong. Turns out, quite a few of them are wrong. As with all things on the internet, most ‘common’ knowledge should be taken with more than a pinch of salt. Whether it’s hearing about the Kessel Run in a Star Wars movie or the inevitable ‘Beam me up’, let me give you a few pointers to prevent you looking like a fool in nerdy conversation.
Star Trek – Beam me up, Scotty.
The famous line of Captain Kirk to his intrepid crew to be transported back to the majestic Enterprise. Unfortunately, our beloved leader never actually uttered these words. The closest he came was when he says “Scotty, beam us up” in The Gamesters of Triskelion and a few later episodes.
James Bond – Many Men
Over the years, there have been many to play the part of Britain’s most famous secret agent. With the actors constantly changing, many people are taught to believe that they are all different people playing the same person. Connery-Bond gets shot off-screen? Bring on Moore-Bond! Each time Bond gets killed, somebody else could simply be trained back into the role and sent off on missions. White guy, shaken not stirred, horrific womaniser… Okay, you’re now 007. But all that went out the window with Skyfall. Here we are shown there was a young James Bond. Childhood, parents, and tragedy were all included. It might have been a persona once but all that’s gone out the window with Daniel Craig.
Star Wars – The Kessel Run
“Parsecs are a measurement of distance, not time.” I have heard the ignorant and misinformed pass along that little tidbit so many times I just want some of them a few parsecs away. The Kessel Run is a smuggling run. You have to get from A to B to C as quickly as you can. But at hyperspeed it’s difficult to turn to avoid celestial bodies so the entire route is programmed in beforehand. If you take a longer route, you can lower chances of getting caught but also risk being late. Han Solo took a route straight past several planets without crashing into any. Hence, the boast about doing so quick. Han avoided any collisions and set a new record.
Star Wars – Various
I’ve put the Kessel Run as its own segment as it’s almost a crime against the entire franchise that people still get it wrong. But here (in very short form) is a quick list of misconceptions we all ‘know’ about Star Wars.
- Planet Endor – Sorry folks, it’s a moon. Amazingly, the same thing happens in James Cameron’s Avatar. Once again, set on a moon.
- Darth Vader’s Amnesia – Anakin went rogue and became Darth Vader (sorry, spoiler there). So why doesn’t he remember any of his old friends? Well, he actually only met Obi-Wan (who he did remember (and killed)), Palpatine/Sidious and Tarkin (who he worked for) and C-3PO (who Vader only saw when freezing Han) during his days as Anakin.
- Obi-Wan Forgot The Droids – “I don’t recall ever owning a droid.” Think back to films I-III. Obi doesn’t meet C-3PO until the third film where he belongs to Anakin. And R2-D2 belonged to the Naboo government before Anakin did his space battle and R2 came along for the ride. After that, Obi had R4-P17 and never actually worked directly alongside our true and blue that much. A few brief glimpses in days gone by doesn’t really hold in memories that well.
- Stormtroopers Always Miss – Hang on, when does this happen? Throw away the escape from the Death Star (where they were let go) and it falls apart. Obi-Wan actually comments on how accurate the soldiers are. Endor, countless Ewoks die. Leia’s abduction, her entire crew (minus one identically dressed captain) are easily killed.
- Luke, I am your father – Close, but no cigar. Instead of Luke, it’s “No”. The full line is “No, I am your father.”
Inception – Dreams Within Dreams
Popular culture now dubs one thing inside another as X-ception. But the masterpiece that is Inception actually has it the other way around. What people believe to be ‘inception’ is actually just called ‘dreams’ or sometimes ‘dreaming’. Inception was planting an idea in somebody else’s mind through dreams. The group used a dream, within a dream, within a third dream to reach the deepest levels of subconsciousness. Then they implanted an idea – an ‘inception’.
Friday The 13th – Jason’s Chainsaw
Hockey mask? Check. Undead maniac? Check. Chainsaw? Che… wait, what chainsaw? Once again, popular media has it wrong. Jason Voorhees is stereotypically portrayed and remembered with a chainsaw. But Jason never actually uses a chainsaw. The closest he comes is with a deadly hedge trimmer in Part VII: The New Blood and being attacked by one in Friday the 13th Part 2.