In one of the best Deadpool comics a former S.H.I.E.L.D. agent magically resurrects every dead president from George Washington to Ronald Reagan. Instead of trying to make America great again, this time they’re all hell-bent on destroying it. Cue a cage match with Abe Lincoln, hunting in a zoo with Teddy Roosevelt and a battle with Reagan in space. It would be amazing to see this, and only the Deadpool franchise could get away with it on the big screen. However, it probably won’t happen as it’s rather unpatriotic and while Deadpool likes to poke fun, alienating the whole American population might be a bit much. So, instead let’s move onto something more realistic but just as bonkers.
These alternate versions of Deadpool make the original Deadpool look normal by comparison. Head and shoulders above these versions is Headpool; a decapitated zombie head that wants original Deadpool’s body for his own in order to usher in the zombie apocalypse. Following closely behind we have Dogpool; a dog given the healing powers of Deadpool after a cosmetics company tried to create eternal youth with their Mascara-X program.
Just as small and just as deadly is Kidpool; this lightsaber-wielding child version of Deadpool is rescued from the Xavier Orphanage for Troubled Boys where he didn’t fit in with the highly strung X-Men. Finally, the one person Wade Wilson would find more attractive than himself, Lady Deadpool; Wanda Wilson comes from a world where she is battling a fascist version of Captain America. Having Deadpool’s girlfriend Vanessa adopt the mantle of Lady Deadpool would be a nice way to work this character in, although this would conflict with her comic book alter ego, Copy Cat.
If a dog version of Deadpool isn’t enough for you on the animal side of things, we have Hellcow, a vampire cow that wears a Dracula-esque cape. There’s been a few adventures for this bloodsucking bovine throughout the comics, the best of which was when Hellcow made Deadpool a vampire in order to fight Kilgore.
Deadpool likes Hellcow so much, he even goes back in time (well, comic panels) in order to change the story and save her when she dies. Convincingly putting a vampire cow into a live-action film might be a little bit difficult, but Deadpool has gone through a lot for beautiful Bessie. One option is to team her with someone she and Deadpool both have shared history with — Howard the Duck.
Howard the Duck
Howard the Duck was one of the first characters that came across Hellcow in the comics. The ambitious adventurer tracked down and killed Hellcow in order to try and get a position on the Cleveland Police Force, a typical exploit for Howard in the comics.
On screen, Howard gained notoriety for appearing in a 1980s cult classic that gained a following regardless (or maybe even because of) how bad it was. The cringe-worthiness of it would provide Deadpool with a litany of quips, fourth wall breaks and insults that they’d virtually write themselves. With Howard already existing in the Marvel Cinematic Universe and Deadpool soon to join (when the rights to the character are bought by Disney) these two could be the surprising lynchpins to pull the two universes together.
Another character with the same comedy tone of Deadpool is Squirrel Girl , a superhero with a squirrel tail, claws and the ability to talk to squirrels. Her comic series has gained popularity in the last few years with a lighter hearted and inclusive tone that separates it from most mainstream comics. A running joke is Squirrel Girl’s ability to defeat some of the most powerful villains, including Thanos and Doctor Doom.
The two characters have crossed paths a few times and are clearly close as Deadpool has a pair of Squirrel Girl underoos and she has Deadpool’s Guide to Super Villains; a Top Trumps-esque pack of cards that details all super villain’s weaknesses and strengths.
We’d like to see Squirrel Girl join Task Force X initially as a joke, (akin to Peter in Deadpool 2) who then proceeds to inexplicably save the team repeatedly.
Bob, Agent of Hydra
Someone who’s saved Deadpool multiple times in the comics and already turned up in the movies (albeit briefly) is Bob, Agent of Hydra. A henchman who joined a super criminal organisation for all the right reasons — dental cover. Their first meeting was when Deadpool was four inches tall and tortured Bob with a plastic security card to get out of a Hydra base. Over the years he’s had a lot of adventures with Deadpool and survived mostly intact, which is surprising as his only skill is running away. With Deadpool clearly knowing Bob from the first film it’d be great to find out how they know each other and if he ever did manage to get that dental cover.
Someone who doesn’t need dental due to her fantastic set of pearly whites is Mistress Death. Deadpool first meets Death when he has a number of ‘near-death’ experiences, confirming that nothing is too literal when reading a Deadpool comic. Death soon becomes obsessed with Deadpool as he is the one person she cannot have, due to his near immortality. This interest from Death even makes Thanos jealous enough for him to place a curse on Deadpool. Recent incarnations of the character are sporting Day of the Dead Catrina makeup which would go rather well with Deadpool’s favourite food item, a chimichanga.
A light-hearted take on the character (like Mort in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld) that throws in quips from the sidelines while waiting for characters to die could be a great counterpoint for the unfazed Deadpool.
Is there anyone we’ve missed that you’d would like to see in Deadpool 3? Let us know @GetFANDOM or check out our Marvel page to learn more about these characters.